So today I put some things on my myspace calendar of upcoming things I am going to be doing and I added my birthday. I will be turning 25 in October. I have been dreading this for a while but I don’t know if I am so dreading it right now. I was thinking that there are some benefits of finally being 25; 1 I can rent a car from anywhere and not have to pay an underage driver fee, which is awesome, 2 my car insurance will go down and yeah those are pretty much the only things I can think of. It’s just hard for me to think I will be turning 25 because I never thought I would be in the position I am in now. I always thought by 25 I would be married and probably have a kid by now, I never wanted to go to college and now I want my doctorate. 25 is like middle age, its scary! *Keep in mind that when I was brewing up this master plan of mine for my life, I always said/thought to myself that I would have a lot easier time getting a boyfriend out of high school because I will then be dating adult men, and adults don’t look at looks as much as young boys in school b/c it is who a person is that makes them beautiful ,so I defffffffinatley thought I wasn’t going to have any problems. Hahahaha the things we think when we are young!! Not that I have problems but I think you all get what I mean…
I don’t know it’s all just kind of discouraging because here is how I look at it: I will be 25 if and when I ever meet someone it takes forever for you to get to know someone, I could invest a good couple of years into a relationship and have it just end one day. But let’s just magically I meet someone and I think they are someone I can tolerate for the rest of your life or that they could tolerate my precious ass : ) and it’s like BAM I will be like practically 30. I just never wanted to have kids late in life; I wanted to be a young cool hip mom. But 30 is not really old, I just keep comparing myself to other people, things are not like they use to be when my parents had me. There are so many young kids that have babies now and they shouldn’t be having them at the ages they are. Over ½ the kids I graduated with have kids, it’s kind of nuts and I guess I look at that as having something great and looking at them as they have a lot. Then I look at myself and say “what have I done with my life?” But I have traveled a lot and I am now in school so, everyone is different, I am me and I have to accept that for myself what I have done is best for me!
If I don’t have someone by the time I hit 30, I’ll just get my own baby. I could totally be a single mom, not that that is how I want it to be, but I can do it. Trust me I know a lot of people who have kids and if they can do it, I can surely do it! I also want to adopt a baby, maybe an Asian child or something… as previously stated I want to mix it up. Having my own family and/or at least a children (yes, I did just type that) means a lot to me so. Am I crazy or do all girls think of these things?!
